a group of teens waving and talking to each other

Support Groups Are Powerful!

I’m a huge advocate of finding support groups that cater to an individual's needs because they have helped me embrace and normalize who I am.

The first support group I attended was an HIV support group for teens when I was 12 years old.

I was told that I had HIV at the age of 9. I was then automatically put into one-on-one sessions with an HIV specialist to learn about HIV and to have a space to share my feelings.

My mother eventually found me a support group because she didn’t want me to feel alone; she felt it was important for my well-being to be around children that are also HIV positive.

I’m incredibly grateful that my mother did this for me because it positively impacted my life.

It helped me understand the significant role of support groups in my well-being. Therefore, I started to seek them on my own for my other internal needs.

Why I left the HIV support group

When I became an adult, I left the HIV support group I attended for years as a teen because it wasn’t aligning with how I felt about sex and relationships.

Emphasis on monogamous relationships

Our monogamous culture never resonated with me. It felt performative and restricted due to its guidelines.

I believe a relationship between two people should be customizable because everyone's needs are different and are constantly changing.

Also, I feel that monogamy encourages being possessive, and I know I'm not interested in owning anyone or being owned. I only want to engage in relationship dynamics that encourage my partner and me to be our authentic selves and support each other's passions.

Differing views on sex and relationship dynamics

I'm also am sex-positive. We live in a sexually oppressive culture where we are taught that respectable sex is shared between two people who are committed to each other long term. I don’t share that belief system.

I look at sex as a way to connect with others and ourselves. So, casual sex, friends with benefits, open relationships, and alike are relationship dynamics that resonate with me.

But it is challenging to have an ethically non-monogamous relationship in our culture because monogamy is the normative way of being in a relationship.

Often friends and casual sexual partners don’t share the same views that I hold around sex, making my ideal relationship dynamic more difficult.

Another reason it’s challenging is because of incorrect teaching of sex, female pleasure, and sexual health.

Creating a community with shared viewpoints

Due to these circumstances, I have to make a massive effort in establishing my views and sharing them with others in my own self-made community.

I have spent years learning and aligning myself with my ideal way of living, and I have explored many communities that I hoped would share my desired lifestyle.

Due to not finding a group that resonates with me completely, I have decided to take action and create the community that I have always wanted.

I hope you all can join me in creating this change.

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