My Bittersweet HIV Journey

I'm grateful to be able to share my story.

It's been a long and bittersweet journey since my HIV diagnosis in 1990. I can't say I was shocked when I found out because I knew I had put myself at risk in 1985. I chose not to get tested because I was afraid. Back then there were no meds that actually worked, a long wait for test results, and what seemed like no hope.

Finding support

I faced this dreadful diagnosis head-on and fought through years of opportunistic infections and even cancer. I thought I was going to die for sure but still tried to keep a positive attitude. I found a lifeline and strength when I attended my first support group in 1991 as it brought me hope and many friendships. It felt great to be able to talk and socialize with others living with HIV who really could understand how I felt.

Raising my son while living with HIV

My mom was my greatest support and was always calming when life got rough. My son was only 10 years old when I found out and the thought of not seeing him grow up was heart-wrenching. He was instrumental in keeping me focused on staying as healthy as I could considering how weakened my immune system had become. I managed to hang on long enough to get on to the antiviral that came out in the mid-nineties.

Finally feeling better

They saved my life for sure as I started to feel and look better. For the first time, I felt hope. Something that had been missing for so many years. I now had to deal with the fact that maybe I wasn't going to die so young but that was a good thing. I didn't feel strong enough to go back to work full time, so I decided to do peer work and volunteer in the HIV field in 1998.

Aging with HIV

What started with speaking at schools and doing street outreach turned into great opportunities to educate people about HIV. I was able to work with Planned Parenthood as an HIV test counselor and also became a New York State Certified Peer Worker in 2016. Magazine stories about living with HIV came my way and even had the honor to be on the covers. I've met so many wonderful people over the last 30 years who have inspired me and given me courage. I'm now 63 years old and doing pretty well, but aging with HIV has its own issues, and sometimes it's not so easy. I'm undetectable but sometimes that's just not enough.

I will continue to share my HIV story

In conclusion, I'd just like to say how very healing it's been for me to share my story and help educate others. I plan to continue on this mission for as long as I can and it feels good to know why God is keeping me here!!

Interested in sharing your own diagnosis story, treatment experience, or another aspect of living with HIV?