Could I have HIV? (21 year old female)
Hey everyone! I know this forum isn’t a place to get diagnosed but I’m really freaking out and don’t know who else to turn to. Around 3-4 weeks ago I had unprotected sex with a 36 y/o bisexual man. Then around 3 weeks later (now) I have weird flu like symptoms- extremely swollen lymph nodes, sore throat with white patches, coughing blood and fatigue. As soon as I typed my symptoms in the first thing I seen was early HIV! At first I didn’t connect the two, but now it’s all that’s on my mind 🙁 I don’t even know if he does have HIV but it’s such a coincidence I have these symptoms exactly 3 weeks later. What are the chances that I do have HIV? Without putting it in too much detail I’m 99% sure that no actual bodily fluids were exchanged if you know what I mean but I’ve heard it can still be spread. Any help is appreciated as I can’t think of anything else right now.
I'm so glad you reached out because like you said, there are so may things that people say about HIV that you might hear that are not accurate. We are glad to have the chance to give you some information that I hope will help.
We are not medical professionals and cannot give out specific medical advice, or like you said, we can't detect a diagnosis. However, we can say that the risk of transmission varies based on the type of contact. The five fluids HIV can be transmitted through are breast milk, blood, precum, semen, and vaginal secretions, but not saliva or sweat. In the case of transmission through oral sex, the risk is at the lower end of the spectrum compared to unprotected vaginal or anal sex. You can definitely learn more about the specifics which may ease your mind through this article: https://h-i-v.net/transmission or here: https://h-i-v.net/living/testing-quiz
Also I should mention, when a person takes treatment and is undetectable, the rate of transmission is essentially zero. I thought you might find this article helpful on the topic, https://h-i-v.net/living/undetectable-untransmittable .
That being said, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention in the United States actually encourages everyone between the ages of 13 and 64 to have at least one HIV test (more here: https://h-i-v.net/diagnosis-testing ), so if you've never been tested it might be a good thing to add to your typical medical care. I have heard from others that testing is less overwhelming and that the testing personnel is more supportive than they thought they might be. I hope this helps, and that you get an answer regarding your symptoms soon. Let us know if there's any more information you may need.
- Liz (H-I-V.net Team Member)
Alafia (Peace) Have you asked him his status? Sorry you are experiencing these symptoms. I wanted to follow up to see if you have went to get an HIV test. Please let us know how we can continue to support you. Khafre (H-I-V.net Team Member)
