I feel like I'm dreaming!

Where do I even begin,I'm just still in shock cause you never think it will happen to you.I had sex with this guu unprotected,it was our sec encounter.Are first encounter was almost a year ago unprotected but we both got tested afterwards and we both were fine and I felt comfortable with him.Out last encounter maybe like a week later I noticed a discharge and thought oh a yeast or bacteria infection.I go to the doc thinking she's just going to give me antibiotics and send me on.I told her I had unprotected sex and she just asked me if I wanted a H.I.V test.It kind of threw me off and I said sure.When I was getting my blood drawn I was literally shaking cause that thought never crossed my mind.I felt fine and then 2 days after the appts my back start feeling a little sore.I brush it off but then I just start feeling weird.I woke up and my whole body was sore like when I had covid.I went and got a covid test and it was negative and my neck felt super contricted.Im like wtf and get to googling H.I.V systems and start freaking out even more.I immediately contact the guy and he tells me he got checked 2 months ago and he's fine and he will take a test to ease me mind.He is trying to tell me I have a cold but my body has never felt like this before.I get headaches quite frequently but this headache felt diff.I have not ate for days waiting on my results.I even went up to a another hospital and they did blood work.I dont know if its cause that wasnt my primary Doc but she said tested me for Flu,Covid,RSV,PNEUMONIA ANS SAID they were negative but they took my blood so why would you test me for H.I.V.I honestly believe she knows cause she made a comment and said my body is fighting an infection they dont test for.I even asked her what type of infections and she name all sorts all but H.I.V.Its something about the look on her eyes I cant get out of my head.She also told me to contact my primary care doc even though she doesn't know I already had blood drawn.I saw my doc on A Mon and she still hadn't called me back so I call to get results cause I tell them she hasn't called me yet and they tell me the system is down and she wouldnt be able to call.I go in person and she is off on friday and will be in On Monday but they said if she didnt it's because my lab isnt back.I am now laying in bed staring at the ceiling and my throat feels so tight.No doubt in my mind I have it .I have never experienced this type of ache ever its leading to it.Please tell me something .How did you guys found out and where are you all now? I already have suicidal thoughts and haven't even gotten my results but I just know it.It's a feeling I cant shake!